sausage
A sausage is a fine way to spice up anyone’s Christmas. Try slicing some for Santa instead of cookies!
Hallelujah!
YOU’VE WON A Insert Prize Here
Where should we send this gift?
*You have to fill out the information.
We can only ship to the USA.
I’m naughty! Ship it to me:
I’m nice! Ship it to my friend:
Look for a confirmation email from joyomatic@redpepperland.com so Santa can deliver your gift!
Bah, humbug! Your spins are spent.
Come back tomorrow and spin again!
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Q & A
What is the Joy-O-Matic, exactly?
The Joy-O-Matic is redpepper’s mechanism for giving you (and your friends) ridiculously awesome holiday gifts, both virtual and physical.
Wait. What gifts can I win?
See the physical gifts here. The virtual gifts? They’re yours for the taking. Click “spin & win” or your space bar to spin. When the spinner stops, simply pin, share or print any of the cheeky Christmas greetings that click into place. Pin one to your “jolly holidays” board. Share one with your bummed-out friend on Facebook. Print one and turn it into stocking flare, a gift tag, tree décor—and more!
That’s swell, but how do I win the physical gifts?
Click the “spin & win” button or your space bar to spin. If three identical greetings click into place, then you’ve won a physical gift. (Click here to see a list of physical gifts.) Next, simply enter your address into the form (or, enter a friend’s address to regift!) and we’ll ship your gift, pronto. (We’ll only use the address to ship the gift. Scouts’ honor.)
How do I get my hands on your drinking game?
Great question! If you see “Play, drink and be merry!” lock into place within the spinner, click the “print” icon beneath it. This will open a PDF version of the drinking game, which you can then print or save. The game includes both heavyweight and lightweight versions (hint: you’ll need a copy of National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation to play).
How do I submit my photograph for the winners’ album?
Three easy steps (two for you, one for us).
- 1) Upload a photo of you and your gift to Facebook.
- 2) Be sure and tag redpepper in the image.
- 3) We’ll download the photo and add it to our album.
It’s that simple!
I won a gift and gave you my address. But it’s been forever and I’ve still got nothing. What gives?
It may be taking a little longer than we anticipated for your gift to arrive, what with the holiday rush and all. If you feel you’ve truly been forgotten, please send a kind, minimally-sarcastic message to joyomatic@redpepperland.com
Something’s not working right and I’m joyless as a result. What can I do?
Please email us promptly at ohshitthejoyomaticisbroken@redpepperland.com
Have a question we didn’t answer?
Send it to joyomatic@redpepperland.com And be nice! Santa is always watching.
Three of a kind wins!
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picklecicle kit
This DIY kit includes everything you need to create your very own picklecicle! Personalize it, then parade it around for extra envy generation.
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santa beard ‘n’ stache
Not everyone can grow face fuzz like the man in red, but with these whiskers you can fool the kids anytime, instantly!
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spotted dick pudding
Because everyone should try it, at least once.
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fruitcake
Everyone’s favorite Yuletide treat, this cake aims straight for the love muscle.
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Journeys gift card
This magical piece of plastic can help you score some new shoes or other fly things from our fine friends at Journeys.
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nutcracker
Show those pecans who’s boss with one of these fine, furry gentlemen.
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Regal Cinemas gift card
A one-way ticket to an evening with the stars (and a buttery popcorn bucket), this gift card offers a trip to the theater with a date of your choosing.
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instant eggnog
Is your flask o’ bourbon feeling a little lonely? Need some nog on the go? No problem! Here’s a pack to keep with you at all times.
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drinking game download
We made a special drinking game just for you. If the Joy-O-Matic lands on “Play, drink and be merry!”, click “print” for your instant download and prepare to forget your name.
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tacky sweater
Each tacky sweater we’re shipping out was hand selected for your bauble-gazing pleasure. The question is, did we choose it? Or did it choose you? Only you can judge.